Indian Style Chickpeas

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There will be no time in your life that you are closer to living in a communist society than in college….barring that you currently live in North Korea.  Or you’ve invented a time machine to hang out with Stalin. Regardless, your professors would like you to believe otherwise. They would have you believe that college is about expanding your mind and opening up your experiences to really appreciate the freedoms college student’s have as individuals. Well your professor’s must have lived in isolation throughout college because that’s not how it works anymore.

According to your roommates, what is yours is theirs. Everything from your clothes, alcohol, or food is up for grabs the second you put it down. And it’s not only your roommates. Remember that expression “lend me some sugar, I am your neighbor” originating from the prophet Andre 3000? Well as soon as you have anything valuable, bolt it down because anything that is not can be “borrowed” without ever bringing it back. Before you know it, your friends’ kitchen seems to have the same plates as yours. And silverware. And IS THAT OUR TABLE THATS BEEN MISSING 3 WEEKS? Of course it is, but they were going to bring it right back though.

Well when in Rome/communist Russia, do as the Romans/commies do, and raid the hell out of all of your friends…cause why the hell not. Grab a can of chickpeas and tomatoes, re-steal your can opener back, pillage an onion, and grab whatever spices you please. Go shopping at your pledge brother’s house for new pans since half of them are probably yours anyways. Throw everything in a pot or pan and let it simmer. Before you know it, you’ll have some spicy Indian Chickpeas to enjoy. Just make sure to keep an eye on it or your comrades will come borrow it too. By that I mean they’ll eat it. All of it.

2 Tablespoons of oil
3 cloves of garlic, minced
1/2 onion, chopped
1 16 oz can of chickpeas, drain a little bit of the fluid off
1 16 oz can of diced tomatoes, drained
1 teaspoon of tumeric
1 teaspoon of cumin
2 teaspoons of garlic powder
2 teaspoons of onion powder
1 teaspoon of cayenne powder
handful of fresh cilantro
salt and pepper


1. Cut up the onions and garlic. Drain the tomatoes and drain a small amount of the liquid from the chickpeas can.

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2. In a pot or a pan, heat up the oil to a medium high heat. Sautee the onions and garlic together until onions are clear and the garlic starts to brown, about 3 minutes.

3. Add the chickpeas, tomatoes, and the cilantro. Stir. After add in all of the spices.

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4. Bring mixture to a boil, then let cover, turn down the heat and let simmer for 15 minutes. Uncover and stir. Let simmer for another 5 minutes.

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5. Serve over rice. Place leftover in the refrigerator and watch it magically disappear before you get a chance to drunk eat it later.